Wednesday, December 22, 2004


A new addition to the Big Book of Bunkum:

sinthesizer (n.) one who compiles a list of naughty things you’ve done over the past year depriving you of a gratuitous gift from a Scarlet-Tunic Obese Person of Good Cheer, a low-carb chocolate egg delivered by an ADD Easter Bunny, and a plastic bag that won't break, tear or dissolve for 150 years offered as a Father's Day giveaway by a bi-polar personality called, “The Man From Glad'N'Sad”

e.g. The disgustingly obsequious, indelicate front-line superviser (named Bobbie Beehunter), preened her feather boa, plucked her bushwhacked eyebrows, and hit the big red button on her computer keyboard marked “panic” before speaking in a vampy voice into her new-fangled, hands-free-feeding, Panasonic Plain Paper Fax/Copier with Caller-Id to accept a blind-date, (from an email buddy affectionately known as "sinthesiser"), to attend a fundraiser for people with two left feet sponsored by the Botswana Bingo Hall in Camel Hump, Wyoming

Contributed by: Buford Edelweiss Potluck, a casual storm-watcher and certified towel security guard from Uclulet, British Columbia (where all the flakes and fruitcakes live and where wise men are advised never to set foot if they value the hair on their head and chest, or wish to retain their status at the top of the funky food chain)