OOPSOTOMIST

A new addition to the Big Book of Bunkum:

oopsotomist (n.) one who is noted for being rarely on the ball, on the beam, or on the button for that matter

e.g. Horace Shufflebottom, hurried quickly out of his environmentally-friendly water closet, actually it was more akin to a convenient composting and comfortable communion spot which he shared with his best friend, (a humble, easy-to-read earthworm named Boris, whom he felt at one with since any earless, eyeless, legless and slimy species that could convert veggie peelings into fertilizer overnight, slither about with grace, and only occasionally grunt if he didn't get a good-sized daily ration of cabbages and horeseradishes - undoubtedly a big boon especially in this day and age of backstabbing, boondoggling and far too much skullduggery); only an oopsotomist by nature would even consider coaxing an earthworm out of his underground home by belting out a bouncy burlesque tune on a medieval horn with tassles attached...which is why he decided it was high time that he and Boris sign up for the World Worm Charming Championship this year in Worms, Nebraska!

Contributed by: Nybster Nubbock, a lusty lorry driver from Lutton Gowts (a place few have ever heard of nor intend to visit in what remains of their precious lifetime)